The definitive Guide to Cunnilingus

Articles reproduced courtesy of adult friend finder advice section.

Cunnilingus Article 1

"Eating" a woman's pussy is about the most wonderful
thing you can do for her. It makes her feel loved, admired,
sexy, and of course it makes her orgasm like crazy. Many women
prefer it to intercourse, and for most, it is the easiest
way to orgasm with a man.

You may have the smallest dick on the
planet, but if you give great head, you will be appreciated
as a fabulous lover. Yes, it's that important. Apart from anything, most women
expect it these days - you might as well know what your doing.

First off, guys seem to have a strange love / hate relationship
with women's genitalia. Guys that can't wait
to get their dick into one are often reluctant to put their
face "down there". For every guy who says he
loves to eat pussy, there's another one who's
squeamish. Women know this, and it affects their ability
to lay back and enjoy the experience. There is nothing more
exciting to a woman than to know that her partner finds her
delicious.



Don't be coy, you should tell her. When a guy fingers
a lady and then smells, licks, sucks the juice off his finger
and sighs as if in heaven, she knows this is her lucky day.

The following techniques should not be introduced until
your partner is really hot (i.e. she's no longer coherent).
These are very intense actions which may be "too much"
for some women, even when nearing orgasm.
With her clit still exposed, give it a quick little suck
- pulling it into your mouth briefly and letting it go. This
is a lot like licking a bit of cake batter off of your pinky.
This feels incredible, and is a fine thing to do if you feel
like torturing her (see PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER below).

Take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently (at first,
anyway) suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue
over and around it. This can be done very lightly or very
aggressively, and combined with fingering, will usually
rapidly produce an intense orgasm.

Another choice technique involves rolling your tongue
into a tube. If you can't do this with your tongue, you
can't learn it - it's genetic. For those who can,
this works best in an inverted or 69 position. Roll your
tongue into a tube around the shaft of her clitoris. Slide
it up and down; in effect, your tongue makes a tiny pussy
for her clit to fuck. This also is likely to bring her over
the edge.

FINGERS

Fingers are a valuable adjunct to eating pussy. Most women
masturbate by pressing a finger or fingers over their clit,
possibly "thru" the skin of their inner or outer
lips, and vigorously rubbing in a circular or back-and-forth
direction. You can do this too, and it is most helpful to
ask, or better yet, have her show you how she likes it done.
You will never be a good lover until you can bring your woman
to climax with your hands. When you fuck her from behind,
or up her ass, or really in any position which doesn't
allow her to simultaneously rub her vulva against your
body, reach down or around and rub her clit. I know it's
distracting, but just do it anyway. One important point
to note: make sure that your fingers are well lubricated.
There is nothing more uncomfortable (and sometimes downright
painful) than a dry finger roughly rubbed across one's
clitoris.

Of course, that's not all you can do with your fingers.
One technique which is very exciting is to spread her lips
wide apart with one hand, and with your index finger straight
like a pencil, flick the side of it rapidly across her clit.
This motion alone will often bring a woman to orgasm. Combining
this with the addition of some tongue action elsewhere
is nothing short of bliss.

Sticking one or more fingers inside her vagina is also wonderful.
You can simply move them in and out (this feels best with
at least two or three fingers, pushed in hard), or wriggling
them around. A particularly intense motion is to face your
hand so that you have two fingers inside her with your palm
facing the front of her body. Now move your fingers rapidly,
as if waving hello. You are aiming to stimulate a particular
part of the woman's vagina - namely the lower anterior
(front) part. When combined with sucking her clit, this
is nearly certain to bring her to a fast and intense climax.

An excellent way to begin manual stimulation is to stick
one (and later two) fingers inside her, with your palm cupped
over the mons area. I'm talking about that fleshy "mound"
over her pubic bone. Your finger goes in and out and the ball
of your hand is pressed hard against her vulva. You may want
to rub or even shake the entire area with your palm.
Fingers also do nice things to tight little butt holes,
but that's a whole other story...

ANAL PLAY

This stuff is purely optional. If anal play doesn't
turn you on, don't do it. If you're uncomfortable,
she'll pick up on your feelings and start wondering
if it's her pussy that's turning you off. Don't feel that you can't be a
good lover without anal play; you can.

Cleanliness is of the essence. (remember that nice soapy
shower?) Scoop out some luscious juices (from a very wet
pussy) with your finger and rub it around her anus. (If she
isn't well lubricated, saliva works too.) If that's
all you or she feels comfortable with, fine - it still feels
great. But I think most women enjoy the feel of a finger pushed
up their ass while they're being fucked or eaten. You need to be gentle,
possibly even leaving your finger still. Try moving it in and out a little,
or around in a circle. If she starts moaning, you know you're doing something right.

It's really fun to feel a woman's anus rhythmically
squeezing your finger as she orgasms. (And it's great
for her, too) You're probably thinking about what
that would feel like around your dick, and it's something
you should certainly explore. Ass-fucking is somewhat
out of the scope of this article, but suffice to say, if she
doesn't like a finger up her butt, she sure as hell won't
want your big dick up there. Even if she does enjoy this sort
of play, she may still be somewhat apprehensive about putting
something so large up there.

The keys to success are sufficient
(i.e. copious amounts of) lubrication (a water-soluble
type such as K-Y, which is safe for condoms), relaxation
on her part, and a slow, gentle, approach. She'll certainly
tell you if she wants you to thrust harder or deeper. And
remember, if you want to feel that delicious squeezing
around your cock, reach around and diddle that clit!

As for anallingus - why not? Don't feel like you HAVE
to do it to satisfy your woman. But if the idea turns you on,
great. Let your tongue rove as it pleases. It's not
necessary to actually put your tongue inside her butt to
stimulate the area. Back and forth, around and around,
you get the picture.

One hygiene note: once that finger (or your penis) has been
inside her ass, don't even think about putting it anywhere
else. Carelessness in this regard can cause a horrendous
infection.

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

I think variety is crucial. Some guy posted an article detailing
a road map of kissing and licking (first here, then here,
etc.) Much better to do the unexpected; sometimes a hungry,
aggressive approach, other times a laid-back, leisurely
one. You can even even include your nose, or your chin into
the act. Start slow, that's the key, and let your lover
guide the speed of the crescendo. In all cases, start gently.
Roughness and clumsiness are big turn-offs. As she gets
more and more excited, pay more attention to her clitoris.
When she's three breathes away from orgasmming, moving
your mouth off or away from her clit is agony. That's
fine if you're intentionally torturing her, just
understand that this is what you are doing. The only prohibition
is to be reasonably gentle with her clit. Nibbling or biting
is fine elsewhere, but we're talking about a sensitive
spot.



Speaking of prolonging the agony... I think this is great
fun. Bring your partner just to the edge of orgasm, and stop.
This is not easy unless you really know your lover well.
Instead, just have her help you. Say, "Grab my head
and stop me just before you think you're gonna orgasm."
Then take your sweet time. Blow on her clit, take it into
your mouth just briefly, flick it just the very slightest
bit. You will have this woman squirming and moaning like
she's dying. Finger her deeply, enjoy the ecstasy
you are imparting, and finally, have pity. Let the poor
woman orgasm.

Okay, she's practically suffocating you, she's
pressed so hard against your face; she's screaming
and bucking up in the air; you feel her pussy contracting
wildly - how long should you keep it up?? The simple answer
is, until she makes you stop. Some women may stop you after
five seconds from the start of their climax, others may
be able to roll right into another orgasm if you keep going.
Do come up for air, but remember, her excitement does not
drop off as sharply as yours does. Play it safe by continuing
the stimulation.
How many times does she need to orgasm? Some women are very content
to have one orgasm. A whole lot of women would really like
to orgasm again, but need about five minutes to recoup. Many
women are so sensitive right after they orgasm that they may
push your head violently away. This doesn't necessarily
mean they've had enough, only that you need to stop
for a few minutes. In fact most women, given a short rest
between, are capable of orgasmming again and again. A smaller
percentage of women are able to orgasm repeatedly with continued
stimulation. This is the much-touted multiple-orgasm
that is experienced by a minority of women. I know this makes
it difficult to know when enough is enough, but there's
a simple answer: ask her.

GODI'MSOEXCITEDITFEELSGREATBUTIJUSTCAN'TCOME

It happens to all of us sometimes - distraction, embarrassment,
anxiety, or just an inability to "let go". What
do you do about it? The first question is, can she easily
bring herself to a climax in the privacy of her own home.
If the answer is no - then she needs to do some homework. There
are two books on the subject that I know of: For Yourself:
The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality by Lonnie Barbach,
and Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving by Betty Dodson; pick
up one. Then tell her to read it, study it, and practice,
practice, practice!

Now if your partner is orgasmic only when alone - ask her
point blank: "Is there something different I can
do?" Many women are shy about criticizing their lovers,
but if asked outright will surprise you with a very specific
answer. It may be a simple matter of mechanics, like a little
to right please, or not so rough, or more pressure and faster.

Ah... perfect.

But suppose everything is wonderful. She says you're
doing everything right but she just can't orgasm. There
are two probable causes: selfconsciousness and/or self-loathing.
For women who can't help watching themselves, the
best approach is to eliminate anything that focuses her
attention on what the two of you are doing. This is a "be
here now" kind of thing - definitely not an introspective
activity. Get that mirror off the ceiling. Dim the lights
or turn them off completely. Put on some soft music. Share
a glass of port. (I said A glass - getting drunk will definitely
not help). Have her lay on her back, or propped up comfortably
with some pillows. This is not the time for her to sit on your
face, or the edge of the bed, or standing up against a wall.
Arrange a time when you can devote a long period to eating
her pussy, and then just keep it up. Forget everything I
said about asking her questions - just close your eyes and
get into it. I know this can be a difficult and exhausting
exercise, but she will be extravagantly thankful for your
efforts. It gets easier each time. If all else fails, get
accustomed to masturbating together. Gradually begin
to add your stimulation to her own, right before she's
about to orgasm anyway. Over time, you can take over completely.

For women who themselves feel that their cunts are dirty
or distasteful, all of the above methods may be helpful,
but the underlying issue must also be addressed. I am amazed
at how many women are ambivalent about their own genitals.
They don't love "that part" of their body,
and they can't believe that you would either. Yes,
it is important to be clean. But clean means a daily shower
which includes washing the vulva. It doesn't mean
vainly attempting to remove every trace of smell or taste.
The natural fragrance and secretions of a healthy woman
are beautiful and erotic. Hopefully you agree (and if not,
try hard to cultivate this attitude). When she learns to
love her pussy, she will be infinitely more comfortable
with your loving it too.

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Cunnilingus Article 2 - "How to Eat Pussy"

Hey, I have a lot of respect for all you guys who like to eat
pussy because there are too few of you out there. And I'm
not the only woman who says this. Furthermore, some of you
guys who are giving it the old college try are not doing too
well, so maybe this little lesson will help you out. When
a woman finds a man who gives good head, she's found
a treasure she's not going to let go of too quickly.
This is one rare customer and she knows it. She won't
even tell her girlfriends about it or that guy will become
the most popular man in town. So, remember, most guys can
fuck, and those who can usually do it satisfactorily, but
the guy who gives good head, he's got it made.
Most women are shy about their bodies. Even if you've
got the world's most gorgeous woman in bed with you,
she's going to worry about how you like her body. Tell
her it's beautiful, tell her which parts you like best,
tell her anything, but get her to trust you enough to let
you down between her legs.

Now stop and look at what you see. Beautiful, isn't
it? There is nothing that makes a woman more unique than
her pussy. I know. I've seen plenty of them. They come
in all different sizes, colors and shapes; some are tucked
inside like a little girl's cunnie and some have thick
luscious lips that come out to greet you. Some are nested
in brushes of fur and others are covered with transparent
fuzz. Appreciate your woman's unique qualities and
tell her what makes her special.

Women are a good deal more verbal than men, especially during
love-making. They also respond more to verbal love, which
means, the more you talk to her, the easier it will be to get
her off. So all the time you're petting and stroking
her beautiful pussy, talk to her about it.

Now look at it again. Gently pull the lips apart and look
at her inner lips, even lick them if you want to. Now spread
the tops of her pussy up until you can find her clit. Women
have clits in all different sizes, just like you guys have
different sized cocks. It doesn't mean a thing as far
as her capacity for orgasm. All it means is more of her is
hidden underneath her foreskin.

Whenever you touch a woman's pussy, make sure your
finger is wet. You can lick it or moisten it with juices from
inside her. Be sure, by all means, to wet it before you touch
her clit because it doesn't have any juices of it's
own and it's extremely sensitive. Your finger will
stick to it if it's dry and that hurts. But you don't
want to touch her clit anyway. You have to work up to that.
Before she becomes aroused, her clit is too delicate to
be handled.

Approach her pussy slowly. Women, even more so than men,
love to be teased. The inner part of her thigh is her most
tender spot. Lick it, kiss it, make designs on it with the
tip of your tongue. Come dangerously close to her pussy,
then float away. Make her anticipate it.
Now lick the crease where her leg joins her pussy. Nuzzle
your face into her bush. Brush your lips over her slit without
pressing down on it to further excite her. After you've
done this to the point where your lady is bucking up from
her seat and she's straining to get more of you closer
to her, then put your lips right on top of her slit.
Kiss her, gently, then harder. Now use your tongue to separate
her pussy lips and when she opens up, run your tongue up and
down between the layers of pussy flesh. Gently spread her
legs more with your hands. Everything you do with a woman
you're about to eat must be done gently.

Tongue-fuck her. This feels define. It also teases the
hell out of her because by now she wants some attention given
to her clit. Check it out. See if her clit has gotten hard
enough to peek out of it's covering. If so, lick it.
If you can't see it, it might still be waiting for you
underneath. So bring your tongue up tot he top of her slit
and feel for her clit. You may barely experience it's
presence. But even if you can't feel the tiny pearl,
you can make it rise by licking the skin that covers it. Lick
hard now and press into her skin.

Gently pull the pussy lips away and flick your tongue against
the clit, hood covered or not. Do this quickly. This should
cause her legs to shudder. When you sense she's getting
up there toward orgasm, make your lips into an O and take
the clit into your mouth. Start to suck gently and watch
your lady's face for her reaction. If she can handle
it, begin to suck harder. If she digs it, suck even harder.
Go with her. If she lifts her pelvis into the air with the
tension of her rising orgasm, move with her, don't
fight her. Hang on, and keep your hot mouth on her clit. Don't
let go. That's what she'll be saying too: 'Don't
stop. Don't ever stop!'

There's a reason for that, most men stop too soon. Just
like with cock sucking, this is something worth learning
about and worth learning to do well. I know a man who's
a lousy fuck, simply lousy, but he can eat pussy like nobody
I know and he never has trouble getting a date. Girls are
falling all over him.

But back to your pussy eating session...There's another
thing you can do to intensify your woman's pleasure.
You can finger-fuck her while she's enjoying your
clit-licking talents. Before, curing or after. She'll really like it. In addition to the erogenous zones surrounding her clit, a woman has another extremely sensitive area
at the roof of her vagina. This is what you rub up against
when you're fucking her. Well, since your cock is pretty
far away from your mouth, your fingers will have to do the
fucking.

Take two fingers. One is too skinny and three is too wide
and therefore can't get deep enough. Make sure they're
wet so you don't irritate her skin. Slide them inside,
slowly at first, then a little faster. Fuck her with them
rhythmically. Speed up only when she does. Listen to her
breathing.

She'll let you know what to do. If you're sucking
her clit and finger-fucking her at the same time, you're
giving her far more stimulation than you would be giving
her with your cock alone. So you can count on it that she's
getting high on this. If there's any doubt, check her
out for symptoms. Each woman is unique. You may have one
who's nipples get hard when she's excited or only
when she's having an orgasm. Your girl might flush
red or begin to tremble. Get to know her symptoms and you'll
be a more sensitive lover.

When she starts to have an orgasm, for heaven's sakes,
don't let go of that clit. Hang in there for the duration.
When she starts to come down from the first orgasm, press
your tongue along the underside of the clit, leaving your
lips covering the top. Move your tongue in and out of her
cunt. If your fingers are inside, move them a little too,
gently though, things are extremely sensitive just now.

If you play your cards right, you'll get some multiple
orgasms this way. A woman stays excited for a full hour after
she's had an orgasm. Do you realize the full impact
of that information? The potential? One woman was clocked
at 56 orgasms at one sitting. Do you know what effect you
would have on a woman you gave 56 orgasms to? She'd be
yours as long as you wanted her.
The last advice I have for you is this: After you've
made her come, make her your slave by giving her the best
head she's ever had, don't leave her alone just
yet. Talk to her, stroke her body, caress her breasts. Keep
making love to her quietly until she's come all the
way down. A man can get off and go to sleep in the same breath
and feel no remorse, no sense of loss. But a woman by nature
requires some sensitivity from her lover in those first
few moments after sex.
Oral sex can be the most exciting sexual experiences you
can have. But it's what you make it. Take your time,
practice often, pay attention to your lover's signals,
and most of all, enjoy yourself.
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Cunnilingus Article 3 - "Female Oral Sex Techniques"

TASTE:

In my experience, one of the main reasons that partners
avoid female oral sex is due to a percieved or even experienced
poor taste. While it is true that women run the range from
pleasant (tasty!) to sour or uric tasting, there are easy
steps to ensure that your partner will be tasting her sweetest.

First and most obviously, a good vigorous shower will do
much to neutralize the taste of your partner. In fact, oral
sex in the shower, while not a favorite method of mine, has
a completely neutral taste if you stick to the upper regions
of your partner's sex. If your partner has not showered
recently, or has physically exerted herself recently,
her taste will be much stronger. This, however, can be a
good thing!
Secondly, foreplay will improve upon both the taste and
the experience in general if your can get her juices flowing.
I have never found an extremely aroused, wet woman to taste
unpleasant. Quite the contrary!

FOREPLAY:

Do it! Take your time! Have fun! Experiment! A common male
misunderstanding is that females are aroused most through
physical contact. Not true. I have aroused women greatly
simply by acting sexy. Tension is a wonderful tool, use
it. If you can build tension to the point where the barest
touch sends electric shivers through both of you, you can't
lose! Similarly, even the best love techniques will not
turn on a woman who isn't in the mood. (If you can get
her in the mood, well then you're talking.)
Take your time, explore your partner (there's a lot
more there than nipples and a clitoris!), build tension,
have fun.

POSITIONS:

There are two basic positions that I have found very versitile
and succesful. For a very comfortable session, have her
lie on her back with legs spread and knees bent slightly.
Lie on your stomach between her legs, put your right arm
under her left leg and your left arm under her right - somewhat
of an intimate hug. Now you should find your head situated
conveniently and comfortably near the center of your attention.

Less comfortable, but a bit wilder is the following. Lie
on your back, prop a couple of pillows (or fold one over)
under your head. Have your partner kneel facing you with
one knee on each side of your head, above your shoulders.
The sexy part of this position (IMH is that your partner
can look down at you and watch you eating her out. (Yum) Versatility
and comfort are reduced for the giver, so I only occasionally
partake in this position.

These are by no means the only positions. Again, experiment,
have fun. If you can find a bed where your partner can lie
down with her legs dangling off the bed and resting flat
on the floor, you're in luck. Now you can have her sit
just at the edge of the bed, lie back, and give you plenty
of access while you kneel/sit in front of her sex.

CUNNILINGUS and GEOGRAPHY:

Woman are very different in some respects of their genitalia,
but the major parts are the same. A woman's sex from
the oral sex point of view consists of two sets of lips (outer
and inner) that meet just below the vaginal opening and
some variable distance above the clitoris; the vaginal
opening (immediately above the nether meeting of above-mentioned
lips), a smooth section of skin between the vaginal opening
and the clitoris (I have no clue as to its technical name,
hereafter it will be refered to as the "scav")
and the clitoris and its surrounding folds.

If you get the chance, explore your partner in a location
with decent lighting. Use your hand to spread her sex and
explore her, find out what's where and what's
what. Like I said earlier, women are different. Especially
the location and shape of the clitoris. It can be buried,
protruding, surrounded by many folds of flesh, or hanging
out it the open. The best method I have found for finding
your partner's clitoris (If all else fails, ask!),
is to place a finger at the very base of her sex and gently
run it up her scav until you feel a slight bump. That's it.

OK, ENOUGH OF THE DETAILS, NOW THE NITTY-GRITTY:

So your partner is showered, excited and feeling sexy.
It's the big moment, what to do? Don't simply dive
in. Take your time, excite her. In my opinion, I can usually
tell how good my partner is at oral sex by how she "goes
down" on me. By "going down" I mean the
process by which she goes from kising my lips to sucking
oh-so-wonderfully on my sex.

Depending on your partner, different methods of going
down will work more effectively. If you've gotten
to this point with your partner, you should have a fair idea
of what she likes. Take advantage of that knowledge. One
thing that I highly recommend however, is a sexy look. Sexy
looks can make all the difference, and the best place to
throw one in is as you're licking, sucking and kissing
your way down her stomach stop, look up and smile devilishly.

Unbutton your partners jean's, pull the tabs back
and kiss her newly exposed flesh. Unzip her pants, pull
the tabs back as far as they can go and place light, tender
kisses on her abdomen and around the top of her panties.
Watch it, some women are very ticklish here!
(Note the above doesn't work so well if she doesn't
have jeans on but you're all smart enough to figure
it out...) Once you've removed everything but her
panties, stop. You have a unique opportunity for further
arousal. Kiss her legs and inner thighs with gentle kisses.
Work your way up each leg and make a point of stopping at the
line of her underwear. Kiss again along the top of her underwear,
and along the other two borders.
Now move to her cotton (silk? lace? latex?) covered sex.
Plant firm, dry kisses through her underwear on her sex,
low and right around the vaginal entrance works best for
me. If your partner is really excited, often her underwear
will be damp and will smell (pleasantly) of her sex.
Removing the underwear is again a matter of choice. You
know your partner best, I prefer either gently sliding
it all the way off with my fingers, or pulling it part way
down with my teeth first.

DIRECT KISSING:

It is not unusual for your partner's lips to be closed
together. A very excited woman's lips may be slightly
spread allready ("pouting"). Again, building tension can be
accomplished by light kisses on either side of her sex as well as light blowing.
(Do not inflate your partner! This can be very dangerous!!) Spreading her lips
can be accomplished by placing your tongue first at the base of her sex, and then
firmly running your tongue all the way up. Continue with a few long licks
from the base of her sex all the way to the top past her clitoris. Vary the
firmness of your tongue from hard and pointed to broad and soft.

THE BIG "O":

The best and most proven method of making your partner orgasm
through oral sex is by repeated, rythmic stroking of her
clitoris with your tongue. The tongue is uniquely suited
for this purpose because of it's texture, versatility,
and pliability. It is difficult (and tiring) to apply too
much pressure to your partner's clitoris. Some women
are much more sensitive than others however. Be receptive
to any sharp gasps, you could be being too affectionate.
If this is the case, move away from direct contact or adopt
a gentler technique.

Repeated, rythmic stroking can be accomplished in a variety
of ways. I prefer either rapid, repeated verticle licks
with a firm, pointed tongue, or planting your tongue firmly
against your partner's clitoris and vigorously shaking
your head back and forth. (Tiring, maybe. But it's
worth it!) If you are having trouble finding the correct
angle or method for rhythmically lingually carresing
her clitoris, or if you want to try something fun and new:

Toungue the abc's. No seriously! This is a great oral
excercise on any part of the body. Toungue the abc's
starting with lower case, and moving though upper case.
(Heck, you could do the whole ANSI ASCII set if you'd
like!) Be especially perceptive while you do this, vary
your speed and watch for sharp intakes of breath - chances
are you've hit the right angle. The abc's give
a large variety of different strokes, so come back to this
excersize as often as you'd like.
A general rule of thumb (tongue?) is to start slow and pick
up the pace as you go along. This is definately a general
rule though, feel free to break it by varying your rhythm,
both slowly and predictably as well as quickly and startlingly.

OTHER FUN THINGS TO DO:

Lick between the inner and outer lips; penetrate the vagina
deeply (a much stronger, iron-like taste here); "tease"
the entrance to her vagina with rapid pokes of your toungue
at varying depths; don't forget your hands, often
a woman will feel a need or ache for something inside of her
while very aroused, oblige her with a finger or two. Both
kissing and manually manipulating your partner is tough,
anyone with succesful methods is welcome to pipe in.
Talk to your partner, ask her what she likes. Experiment
(if you can) with many different partners. What excites
one woman a lot may not excite another as much, but may still
be well worth trying. On the other hand, you may not notice
a subtle pleasurable technique on one woman that can be
easily learned on another. The better you know your parnter,
the more effectively you can please her. Have fun!

A FINAL NOTE:

I tried to be a lot less pretentious than the male version
of this article for a few reasons. The major one is that women
are very different, the above suggestions may work wonderfully
with one woman and so-so with another. Some women simply
aren't responsive to oral sex due to strong moral constraints.
Secondly, I am not an expert, though I love oral sex and have
had the joy of pleasuring 10-20 women. Third, I am still
young (1 and have a lot to learn.
So feel free to comment on what you've read (men and
women) and reply either over the net or to me personally.
Thanks. Hope you found this helpfull and enjoy!

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Cunnilingus Article 4 Q. What is cunnilingus?

Cunnilingus is the fine art of making love to a vagina with
your mouth and tongue. It is a delicate skill, requiring
patience, practice, and dedication to get it right, but
any woman you learn to do it right for will appreciate you
all the more for it.

What applies to the penis applies to the vulva-- every one
is different, requiring a different touch to make its owner
happy. But few tools can equal the tongue for the amount
of pleasure it can deliver to a happy vagina.
This article assumes that you know what a vulva looks like
and can identify with some precision the mons veneris,
labia majora, clitoral hood, clitoris, labia minora,
urethra, vagina, and perineum, to name them (approximately)
from top to bottom.

Q. How fast should I go?

This isn't an attack. Don't go after the clitoris
like a fireman attacking a fire. Quite often at first, the
clitoris is far too sensitive for direct stimulation.
Lick around it, stimulating the hood, teasing her inner
labia, tasting her. Take your time and listen to her. Some
women make noise, and some do not. It will be a while before
you learn exactly what your lover prefers as far as oral
sex is concerned.

Some women may like additional stimulation-- a finger
or two into the vagina, or perhaps even the anus. She may
want your hands to reach up and play with her breasts, or
she may want your fingers to hold her labia apart so that
your tongue can get at her vulva more directly.

Q. I've heard cunnilingus doesn't taste good.

If the taste or smell bothers you or is a concern, ask her
to wash first. Most people who enjoy cunnilingus agree
that a clean vagina is a good, if acquired, taste.
As a woman nears her climax, she may want more direct stimulation.
In general, fast, rhythmic stimulation is most effective
at causing climax-- but there shouldn't be a rush to
get there. Take your time and learn to appreciate what you
can do for her.
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Cunnilingus Article 5 - Oral Sex and techniques

In my experience, when you try to explain to a man "in
the moment" that he is doing oral sex (or sometimes
anything) wrong, often the result is a disaster. You aren't
into it, because you are trying to direct, and I guess for
many guys it comes off as simply insulting. It isn't
a very "supportive process, " to borrow a friend's
phraseology.

Example: "No, not there, ...there..." (Quizzical
looks, no change in behavior.)

Now, if you go looking for diagrams of women's vaginas,
you will find yourself either looking at medical textbooks
or special references, such as Our Bodies, Ourselves ---
which, is presented as a "for women only" sort
of thing. The original edition even gave this little rap
to men about not buying it "for" women. Yeesh!
Good book, but talk about "attitude." The new
edition has thankfully dropped this negative proscription.

You will sometimes NOT even find a clear picture of a woman's
vagina in a general sex reference, such as the original
The Joy of Sex. And you won't find a discussion of the
parts of the vulva in most places. Now, go look for a picture
of a man's penis that is reasonably edifying, and you'll
find them all over. I only discovered this when I tried to
look it up, and since I had never purchased Our Bodies, Ourselves,
I was SOL (corrected that, recently). I however, and all
women, have a ready-made "reference manual, "
provided we have gotten over the idea, or never had it, that
looking at it will somehow be a "bad thing."
Men don't have this reference manual readily "at
hand, " at least if their partner, if they have one,
is not immediately available and cooperative.
I have also read, and just reread, the Cunnilingus FAQ.
Though it seemed excellent in terms of mood, style of approach,
all the "beginning" stuff, I found when I applied
her technique suggestions to me and my experience as a recipient,
or my experience as a giver, it was a bit short on specifics.
I am sure the described approach works very well for the
woman who wrote it , but I have a few things that seem unsaid.

So, you have gone through all the beginning motions, taking
a reasonable amount of time, and you are starting to "get
down to business." First, PLEASE turn on the lights.
Working in the dark is for experts at best. I am assuming
you are sitting between her legs, facing her, or some variation
on this. Now really LOOK at what is there. Where her hair
is (or was, some people shave) is the mons veneris, the pubic
mound. If she is not aroused, everything is likely, but
not guaranteed, to be enclosed within the outer lips or
labia majora, the edges of the pubic mound that comes together
to enclose her vulva.

As you spread this apart (she can bring her knees up and out,
and/or you can use your hands), you will now see the inner
folds of skin of the vulva, the inner lips or labia minora.
These (usually) go all around the vaginal opening, and
come in a variety of interesting and pleasing shapes and
textures.

As you observe that this encircles the vaginal opening,
at the top of this you will find what might look like a button
or might look like a very tiny penis, covered by an additional
flap of skin. The flap of skin is the "hood" of
the clitoris, and is very sensitive, as is the clitoris.
This is the female equivalent of the male foreskin, though
it is much looser than that corresponding organ.
If you see what looks like a button underneath the hood,
then what you are seeing is the glans of the clitoris, exactly
equivalent to your own penis glans, or head of the penis.
If you see a bit more than that, then there is probably some
of the shaft of the clitoris extending in your partner.
I stress this since most men would not be particularly enthused
by a blow job that only gave attention to their penis head
and extended not a centimeter below there. Many might find
it annoying or even painful, depending on how rough their
partner is with them and how sensitive they are to pain in
that area. However, told "give attention to the clitoris, "
by fable and book, many brave soldiers run to do battle on
the field of their woman's desires with their tongue,
only to find their partner is telling them to please stop,
it hurts, or it doesn't do anything for me. This may
or may not be a comment on your technique, some women don't
like oral sex. I would just like to suggest an approach that
probably has a higher average success rate.

The shaft of the clitoris is attached internally, back
into the body of the woman. Pressure on the spot above the
glans and underneath the hood will generally give you access
to the part of the shaft equivalent to the part of your penis
that is towards your body, whereas underneath the glans
will give you access to the part of the shaft that is equivalent
to the part of your penis that is away from your body. It is
likely that the skin directly below the glans will be functionally
equivalent to what is for most men the most sensitive and
pleasurable part of the penis for play, and the inner vaginal
lips are also usually quite sensitive "in a good way."
Going down/in/back, you may or may not see the urethra,
if you do this is the location of the grafenberg spot (g-spot),
which we have all heard on this newsgroup is quite varied
in response, some women love stimulation there, others
do not. Try licking your tongue around there, if it is visible,
and see, in the course of your "investigations."

O.K., so now you have the picture. You did trim / file your
nails first, didn't you? Play with your hands, play
with your mouth, go all over, gently at first, increasing
stimulation and focus as her body responds, and coming
in "closer on" the clitoral area as she becomes
more aroused. Lick, suck, point your tongue and apply pressure,
use it like a "miniature penis" under the glans,
penetrating her as you go, make little circles with your
tongue, lick up and down along the skin in front of the clitoris,
up and down the inner vaginal lips, etc. These are ideas,
find some others, listen to her responses and comments.
Remember to GO SLOW --- I believe impatience and expectations
of quick response are "generally recognized as"
the most common error in sexual encounters. Eventually
the clitoris will become probably become erect, and stimulation
that is "more direct" (like enclosing your
mouth on the area and gently sucking) will stimulate a sufficient
amount of the organ in question to be interesting. Watch
what you are doing, and what happens, the entire area will
become "engorged" and swollen if things are
proceeding closer to orgasm.

Some women may not, or may prefer not, to orgasm this way.
Most will probably, however, enjoy the experience a great
deal. Hopefully this "explanation and comparison"
to the corresponding male body parts will allow you to not
be (still) in the dark with the lights on.

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